Here are a few words from a conversation I had with the Mother Directress (Mary Joseph) toward the end of my novitiate: “Sister, let simplicity and humility be the characteristic traits of your soul. Go through life like little child, always trusting, always full of simplicity and humility, content with everything, happy in every circumstance. There, where others fear, you will pass calmly along, thanks to this simplicity and humility. Remember this, sister, for your whole life: as water’s flow from the mountains down into the valleys, so, too, do God’s graces flow only into humble souls.”
O my God, I understand well that you demand this spiritual childhood of me, because You are constantly asking it of me through Your representatives.
At the beginning of my religious life, suffering and adversities frightened and disheartened me. So I prayed continuously, asking Jesus to strengthen me and to grant me the power of His Holy Spirit that I might carry out His holy will in all things, because from the beginning I have been aware of my weakness. I know very well what I am of myself, because for this purpose Jesus has opened the eyes of my soul; I am an abyss of mystery, and hence I understand that whatever good there is in my soul consists solely of His holy grace. The knowledge of my own misery allows me, at the same time, to know the immensity of your mercy. In my own interior life, I am looking with one eye at the abyss of my mystery and baseness, and with the other, at the abyss of your mercy, O God.
O my Jesus, You are the life of my life. You Know only too well that I long for nothing but the glory of Your Name and that souls come to know Your goodness. Why do souls avoid You, Jesus?- I don’t understand that. Oh, if O could only cut my heart into tiny pieces and in this way offer to You, O Jesu, each piece as a heart whole and entire, to make up in part for the hearts that do not love You! I love you, Jesus, with every drop of my blood, and I would gladly shed my blood for You to give You the less I can comprehend You, but this “non-comprehension” lets me realize how great You are! And it is this impossibility of comprehending You which enflames my heart anew for you, PO lord. From the moment when You let me fix the eyes of my soul on You, O Jesus, I have been t peace and desired nothing else, I found my destiny at the moment when my soul lost itself in You, the only object of my love. In humiliations, failures and suspicions that have come my way are splinters that keep alive the fire of my love for You, O Jesus.